Fail

  • Natalie Portman's Sister Does Porn

    Natalie Portman's Sister Does Porn

    This one taught me two things: A) Breaking points are negotiable and B.) Any case studies of being on the spectrum and in porn can now be cancelled. Dorkalina's got us covered. [Full Scene: HERE]

    Date: 12/10/17 Views: 86,741 Category: Fail

  • Unexpected Cuckold Ending

    Unexpected Cuckold Ending

    Original plan was for Stewart to turn this triple decker into a 4way. Instead, he has an intimate moment with the Shitmaster 2000: Hyper Flush Edition.

    Date: 11/11/17 Views: 140,027 Category: Fail

  • Marry Her

    Marry Her

    Great face. Nice body. But what really got me on board was the complete lack of logic. Look closely. No brains, no thoughts. So cute you'd almost forget this happens when they get more than half a can into their mouths.

    Date: 09/02/17 Views: 193,048 Category: Fail

  • Still Would

    Still Would

    Nothing says 'bust my nut' like teeth broken off at the gum line. She's less than grateful for that flattery, but it's ok. Girls are hotter when they're mad.

    Date: 05/03/17 Views: 200,811 Category: Fail

  • They Lasted 10 Seconds

    They Lasted 10 Seconds

    [original]

    Date: 04/19/17 Views: 196,430 Category: Fail

  • TBT: Creepy Fuck Can't Get it Up

    TBT: Creepy Fuck Can't Get it Up

    If all members of The Backstreet Boys took a collective shit in a bathtub.. this sex offender is what would rise up out of it. But the real tragedy here? His sexual performance is just almost as bad as his haircut. almost

    Date: 03/08/17 Views: 130,474 Category: Fail

  • Never Trust Dollar Store Condoms

    Never Trust Dollar Store Condoms

    Not the first vid I've seen with rubbers getting pushed to their limits, but it may be the most interesting. The average reaction is relationship-ending, MIDOL-needing fury. Her? She just lols her way to Planned Parenthood.

    Date: 01/30/17 Views: 167,850 Category: Fail

  • Don't Even Try

    Don't Even Try

    Only 28% in, & his cock folds like Esmeralda on laundry day. Can someone .GIF the 3 secs when his penis is at a full 90 degrees? Its time I made a PSA on the dangers having sex with more limp than Hulk Hogan's rap solo.

    Date: 12/28/16 Views: 154,503 Category: Fail

  • 30 Seconds of Joy

    30 Seconds of Joy

    Intercourse: It's pretty simple stuff. But for Goober McBallbag, it might as well be mission impossible. Not even after 5 consecutive attempts at penetration does he get close to vaginal satisfaction. Lawd have mercy.

    Date: 12/09/16 Views: 321,874 Category: Fail

  • Mom Approves

    Mom Approves

    This ones special. Her face says i only date guys named Lemarcus and i lost my virginity to a vending machine. But from the neck down she has the body of a pornstar. A blind pornstar. From Guatamala. #marryme

    Date: 10/30/16 Views: 310,464 Category: Fail

  • "That's never happened before"

    "That's never happened before"

    This is 2 parts thriller, 12 parts comedy gold. Confusion begins halfway in, when chumpo yanks his penis out and delivers a C&D to her squash box. Said dipshit then facepalms and legitimately cries. Y? My thesis: HE GAY.

    Date: 10/02/16 Views: 189,623 Category: Fail

  • Humiliated After Robbing the WRONG Girl

    Humiliated After Robbing the WRONG Girl

    Straight outta Tijuana and new to the pickpocket scene, this untrained shit stain stuck his hand on the wrong culo and paid for it big time. His punishment? Humiliation involving all 1.7 inches of his tator tot HAHA

    Date: 05/31/16 Views: 121,208 Category: Fail

  • Worst. Butt Implants. EVER.

    Worst. Butt Implants. EVER.

    A lot of cosmetic surgery, a little money spent & hiring a guy on Craigslist that works out of his garage... what could go wrong? I'll give you a hint: It's shaped like an NFL goal post and more repulsive than Trump's stump.

    Date: 02/25/16 Views: 176,873 Category: Fail

  • How NOT to Have a Threesome

    How NOT to Have a Threesome

    Chumpo thinks the worst time on Earth to go limper than wet toilet paper is worth filming. Sorry pal, brag about teh sluts all you want: If you can't fuck 'em, ur about as useful as Charlie Sheen at a blood drive.

    Date: 11/20/15 Views: 173,536 Category: Fail

  • Experienced MILF vs. Nervous Newbie

    Experienced MILF vs. Nervous Newbie

    Interesting combination. Did she agree to do this scene solely for the challenging of overcoming an 18-year-old already cursed with ED? Or is Aspergers a fetish now?

    Date: 11/16/15 Views: 265,828 Category: Fail

  • Bangin' on a Budget

    Bangin' on a Budget

    Fueled by mental disability, these heavy-breathing fun seekers construct an excess amount (SEE: 1) of DIY love dolls. Imagine if you could get these things in a Chernobyl sweatshop - that's what they're mating with.

    Date: 10/02/15 Views: 120,728 Category: Fail

  • Noobs Can't Double Penetrate

    Noobs Can't Double Penetrate

    Ever watch Dumb and Dumber To? Me neither... but if they were to make a pornographic spinoff with Megan Fox, it might look something like this. Denied entry times: 12:20, 20:15 and Custer's last stand @ 23:30.

    Date: 09/24/15 Views: 132,564 Category: Fail

  • Mistakes Were Made

    Mistakes Were Made

    She sucks, he shoots, she gags. As a result I'm not really sure who's to blame here: Her nitwitted ass for thinking she could be a p-star and not get put in front of a seminal firing squad, or Bruno's all-asparagus diet.

    Date: 09/09/15 Views: 230,489 Category: Fail

  • "LOL I CREAMPIED U"

    "LOL I CREAMPIED U"

    Our main man Amjad is a master of two things: Taxi cab navigation and cooking up the meanest tikka masala this side of the prime meridian. Unfortunately neither of these abilities aid in correct condom usage. RIP Amjad.

    Date: 07/22/15 Views: 130,723 Category: Fail

  • Can't Stop the Cumshot

    Can't Stop the Cumshot

    1st time D-sucker foolishly assumes her job is over and breathes a sigh of relief... only to be shot in the mouth with another wad of Esposito's gold reserve. A choice is needed: gulp or ruin Macy's finest Egyptian bed sheets.

    Date: 07/10/15 Views: 282,920 Category: Fail

  • Blowjob FAIL (HAHA)

    Blowjob FAIL (HAHA)

    S'n some D only has a few rules: Minimal teeth usage and keep the c-rings away from all other jewelry. Not a hard list but this backpage.com alumni decides to test fate anyway, resulting in an epic rage quit. GG NO RE

    Date: 07/05/15 Views: 142,411 Category: Fail

  • The Worst Threesome Ever?

    The Worst Threesome Ever?

    She's pushing 200lbs and thinks NASCAR is entertaining. How can life possibly get any worse? If you guessed "getting tag teamed by guys that have less respect for the female body than Bill Cosby" you're a winner.

    Date: 05/06/15 Views: 124,476 Category: Fail

  • Glory Hole FAIL

    Glory Hole FAIL

    First timer has a minor FML moment after realizing her costar bust nuts that could stop forest fires. Luckily she handles it like a pro. And by pro, I mean spitting up enough protein to turn Bill Nye into Brock fuckin' Lesnar.

    Date: 03/30/15 Views: 260,184 Category: Fail

  • He's Pretty Bad at Sex

    He's Pretty Bad at Sex

    Rodrigo, you dimwitted fuck. There are 2 things you simply don't mess with in life: #1. Seth Green during his menstrual cycle and #2. Women who willingly pierce their clitoris multiple times. You asked for this one brah.

    Date: 03/07/15 Views: 113,427 Category: Fail

  • I'm Sorry, I'm A Homosexual 2

    I'm Sorry, I'm A Homosexual 2

    They stroke, they straddle, they string him up like Elton John during one of his gynecology exams. Unfortunately this gaggle of sluts would have a better chance at splitting the fucking atom than busting this guy's nut.

    Date: 02/23/15 Views: 123,298 Category: Fail

  • I Fucking HATE Facials

    I Fucking HATE Facials

    Can't really blame her. Dude's bush looks like the top of Eddie Murphy's head circa de Beverly Hills Cop 1. If you had to go face-to-egg bag with a nut sac that requires a hairnet, you'd be squinting pretty fucking hard too.

    Date: 11/17/14 Views: 166,631 Category: Fail

  • Creep Ruins His First Porn Shoot

    Creep Ruins His First Porn Shoot

    Mortimer's porn career was over before it began. It's really hard to masturbate to a bald/long black haired pale dude trying to hug and kiss a prostitute. He would be better off playing a villains lanky henchman in a horror movie.

    Date: 09/01/14 Views: 127,837 Category: Fail

  • Failed Attempt at a Happy Ending

    Failed Attempt at a Happy Ending

    Faggy McPonytail over here hit a point in his life where his sweet hair and 2003 honda civic just aren't filling the void. So he puts his heart, his erection and his pride on the line for a chance at a happy ending with a middle aged masseuse.

    Date: 08/10/14 Views: 258,532 Category: Fail

  • Dildo Fail

    Dildo Fail

    She's trying to get off with one of those rubber cocks that have suction cups at the base. They're supposed to be good for hands-free fun but this broad's clam is so tight that the dildo wont stay put. Kinda hot.

    Date: 07/30/11 Views: 144,110 Category: Fail

  • Enthusiasm Fail

    Enthusiasm Fail

    This is quite possibly the most half assed attempt at eroticism to ever grace my computer monitor. Mind you this is coming from a guy that's sat through all 18 volumes of College Scat Girls. My voice matters.

    Date: 07/16/11 Views: 127,045 Category: Fail