Not since paying backpage.com's finest in pennies have I seen a sexual arrangement become such a challenge. A hooker with a no tits no blowjob policy? Congratulations on being more useless than a chocolate teapot.
I've seen this configuration before: Cute Whole Foods cashier above the waist, John Deer lawn aerator below it. I'd contact my local feminist chapter for false advertising, but I've already filled my tube sock & it's time for bed.
Frontal lobe ruthlessly attacked at the hands of a guy that considers Home Depot's hardware dpt EROTIC. No, this isn't my review for the newest ISIS video. It's the Citizen Kane of tardgasms, and you need to see it to the end.
A coworker at Little Caesars once told me she used the side of a Redbull can to pleasure herself. She said the feeling of her deep-dish pizza bowl being grinded made her cum instantaneously. Is that what's going on here?
Not since the days of blindly acquiring porn ala Limewire have I come across a female with such seminal fortitude. She's got standards bro. Know who doesn't have standards? THIS WIND TUNNEL. Laugh there, FAP here.
You see that body language? I know that body language. Roughly translated it means: "if you pull out again, I'll park my Kia Soul in your asshole next time you fall asleep" Go ahead, ask me. Ask me how I know.
I've seen desperate girls do desperate shit to keep their ManyVids account submerged in dollars... but risking life, death and a clean record just to keep cOrNhOLe69 entertained? That's a level of hoe I hope to never encounter.
Not since walking into a waffle house at 2AM have I seen such disrespect for the lower half of a brown female. And like the riot that ended that night, he has no intent of letting $39.00 worth of plastic surgery go to waste.
Adriana Chechik aka Performer of the Year 2017. "Question is, will she be able win2 years in a row? As hot as she is right now, there is a chance that could actually happen, especially with the work she is doing with VR porn"
Self-proclaimed Fap Ninja adds another accolade to her resume, in the form of Nicholas Cage's School of Acting graduate. An unfortunately accurate title you'll agree with when you question your purpose in life around 18:00.
When your rusty bag is knee-level, and the age of medicare is on the horizon - maybe being labeled a sexual predator becomes the least of your problems? For everyone else: You probably shouldn't even attempt this.
I can understand the incestual story arch. I'll ook past the iPhone 3 camera quality. But the no-hesitation, double-dip taste-test of his own pearl jam at 7:22 mark? UNFUCKINGFORGIVABLE you incomplete, slovenly shit donut.
This is standard Asian 'our music sounds like squirrels in a woodchipper, but if I put my mouth on your cock you won't notice it' syndrome. Fortunately science has gifted us the video to accompany this diss track. #springbreak
Degenerate hoebag works feverishly to get sexually assaulted by a guy with more V's in his name than a Russian dictionary... and doesn't come close to succeeding. Enjoy your 0-star YELP review Victor Vahdeem Vyachvyeslahv!
Contrary to gender, age, hair color, fashion sense and skin tone - demanding upper management meet demands isn't really her thing. Luckily she slobs knob better than a golden retriever after a Xanex... so there's that.
Can't imagine how many E.R. vists had to be falsified before she found the sweet spot. I respect the exploration, but the only road this fetish ultimately leads to is Dennis Rodman and strategically placed cream cheese.
This is what happens when Chaturbate gets saturated with internet hookers and you have to find new ways to scalp pennies from strangers - all cause a taxi driver from New Dehli swears on his underwear turban that this is legit.
He watches commands his S/O to chew, lick and gobble her way to next month's utility bill payment. Good call on filming too. Maybe for your next exploit you can use said video to negotiate your way to a free super-size?
Becky shats herself upon realizing her next FB Live appearance won't be a pretty one. I haven't seen such an intense look of confusion and despair since that time I got caught beta testing display toilets at Home Depot.