The ultimate collection (read: 20 images) of intoxicated and/or inebriated females soiling the utter fuck out of their clean images. Perhaps I'm alone on this one... but I'm seeing wife material across the board here.
I'm all for refusing to spend the extra $7.00 on a 3 pack of Magnums, but for real: if she doesn't start scouting better company eventually she'll end up on Maury Povich... and then it's "MISSION FAILED" a la Metal Gear Solid.
This girl's affinity for i licked my brother's taint porn is off the charts. She's been in more lead roles of bullshit refuse to jack off to than Jason Statham. Most likely a symptom of having a BF that fits in her finest Walmart lingerie.
Sorry homey, people really want to see a position they can perform without needing four years of yoga beforehand. Not a move that burns more cock than San Fransisco's herpes outbreak. Now apologize to her ROSS cotton.
A request to 'ride it hard' by a guy that sounds like he knows the square footage of a Runescape map, fails to impress. PRO TIP: Next time hook a car battery to the sphincter. Its called The Berserker Twerker I invented it.
This might kill any train-running fantasies you have. But it will also peak ur curiosity as to how Danny Glover spends a Saturday night. It's what us Internet folk call a video that's perfectly balanced. As all things should be.
Her 'i have a level 73 warlock in Everquest, and use an N64 rumble pack to masturbate with' look is on point. She's also in desperate need of a partner that knows how to dance the butthole boogaloo. Let's see how it goes...
Apparently a 2-pack of Bud Light turns you into the Gandolf of parking lot pussy pickups... and today his teachings are all free of charge. Practice what you see here & I promise those size-11 Craigslist girls will never "LOL" again.
Hey, no one said you had to like it Becky. Just sit back, keep a firm grip on those kneecaps and think about all the McChickens you'll be able to buy as soon as you're done. That's what gets me to the end of my weekdays.
Oodles of ¡ay carambas! highlighted by a pair of guys that just DGAF. Things get a little rough when Mario and Lorenzo go for their patented 'double dipper' move @1:53. Oddly enough she smiles in the end... unlike this girl.
What kind of blue-ball horse shit is this? Jagdish Deshmukbengaba was only inches away from a Bangladesh edition of Fake Taxi, but got outwitted by 2 girls with the combined motor skills of an elephant with alzheimers #shame
Is this really Demi L? No, it's not. But the real question you should be asking is: if they made a campy sequel to this masterpiece, would Bruce Campbell inquire about the use of a stunt cock? These things keep me up at night.
Some guy that considers dollar store tattoos an art form bangs the shame out of the last girl that should be on his ding donger. After the 5th "look at the camera, it begins to feel more like Crazyshit vid than a Pornhub vid.
When you're moist enough to be lubed under water, and have more lung capacity than a Navy Seal - you should be recognized for your natural born gifts. Call Emma Stone & tell there's been a recount for that Oscar Award.
Prostitution is pretty straight-forward. Browse Craigslist Gigs-Labor section and let the restraining orders fly. Unless you're a naive rookie that charges less than KFC's 10-piece Family Feast. Then it gets a little awkward...
Ever cram an entire box of freshly cooked macaroni and cheese into a sock, then stick your dick into it? Of course not, only an idiot would waste $1.99 of Kraft's finest. But I feel like thats the kinda audio were missing out on here.
Only 2 people should never be caught doing the forbidden fox trot: Lindsay Lohan in her 'i'll snort Clorox' phase, and this girl. She's 19, anti-semen and dumber than a mailbox on Sunday. In other words: she was BORN for Efukt.
Nevermind the fact that she looks like scuffed Topanga Lawrence after a spirited round of circle jerking. Inquiring minds really want to know what the going rate for slaughtering your own bacon ring is nowadays. In Rubles.