A little bit off-topic, but sweet mother of dragons, every time this girl sticks out her tongues (every 8 seconds) her face instantly reminds me why TUMBLR and pocket knives are a horrible combination.
I can forgive the potato-grade video quality. I understand the lack of names to prevent Instagram stalking. But cutting off the girls @3:39 before they ran to use honey dijon as lubricant? ZERO/5 stars you simple-minded, incredulous fuck.
The notorious Periscope video streamed live hours before the Asian girl inhaled Oxymorphone and died. I didn't even know a 30+ minute version existed, and judging by Stewart's ragegasm @ the 27:00 mark I'm guessing he didn't either.
This one is kind of hard to describe because without context it just comes off as another Kevin Spacey sex ritual. All I know is, I picked a really bad day to get nostalgic about Power Rangers. #only90skidswillunderstandthis
You just can't go back after this. She'll forever be known as the super THOT of Bumblefuck Alabama. She's essentially a walking, twitching Reddit activist for open sexuality... yet stays in good spirit knowing this vid is going straight to IG.
Forgive my lack of relationship knowledge... but I really want to know: Does having less testosterone than a VICE journalist really attract women? 9 seconds of watching Predator has taught me otherwise. P.S. Nice hospitality Stewart.
Dare to use your pocket change to encourage these females and you'll usually be rewarded with disappointment. Or more seizures than an epileptic with a fast pass to Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey. REASON: Bitches be fakin.
Some women need size to get off. Others, a $12.00 shopping spree at Moe's Tex Mex Grill. Then there's Kenzie Reeves who needs no more than half a mini vienna sausage to send her convulsing back to the baby Gap her wardrobe is from.
She seems like a nice girl. The type that'd throw herself off a government building if you missed a text, or fuck the mailman if your Instagram post got 0 likes. But her enthusiasm? I've seen happier faces cleaning the toilets at Renaissance Fairs.
That's pretty much always been the unwritten rule... and this twat waffle just pulverized it. By the way: nice tattoos, but how about something that actually describes your body for the next one? "eggplant casserole" oughta do it. Yep.
Apparently a 2-pack of Bud Light turns you into the Gandolf of parking lot pussy pickups... and today his teachings are all free of charge. Practice what you see here & I promise those size-11 Craigslist girls will never "LOL" again.
To say she's "in over her head this time" would be a bit of an understatement. Becky can't even get horizontal for more than 18 seconds before homeboy has her clitoris begging for mercy like me halfway into Venom last night.
Flattery is not exactly my strong point, but I gotta say: chick is bangin' yo. I'd gladly chew Kraft Macaroni and Cheese Ninja Turtles Edition out of Usain Bolts post-200 meter relay asshole just for a chance to hold her hand at KFC.
There's something kinda endearing about a girl that has the pride-to-beauty scale of Romanian hooker. Her talents scream give me 6 months and my asshole will out-perform Mexican cartel footlockers. Clearly we're lookin at wife material here.
damn son, check out the dimensions on him. You may have a confusing dream or 2 about being bludgeoned to death by it. Big emphasis on death. The graveyard would be a guarantee if you were to sword fight Captain Black Sparrow over here.
Only 1 thing compliments the feel of a holiday weekend - And that's getting more rash on your crotch from a guy you salad-tossed in the toilet of a Portuguese farmhouse. Note to those inbreds in the last clip: Just end the bloodline here.