Listen homie, I've seen some pretty deplorable shit in my day: Guadalajarian safari porn, erotic photos of Dennis Rodman, Birdemic. But THIS? This shit had my complete attention for all 40.5 minutes. #MAKEASEQUEL
Burritos are burritos, I don't discriminate. But when your bum crumbs are in the vicinity of my guacamole, ur walking on that thin line of reprehensible. Now put your underwear back on before my sour cream is on the house.
How this guy lasted even a minute with her is beyond me. The watermelons are in season, the face is youthful, and gravity hasn't even started turning them into throw rugs yet. Is this what true love feels like?
Easily the most bogus video I've seen since YouTube's social experiment revolution. I must note tho: nobody got hurt, fantasies were fulfilled and this girl's suction should be patented before Dyson rips it off. #DAMN
Floozy blonde sneaks one up her own nasal cavity, but this isn't your typical one trick circus act. From there on, it's a battle of braincells as Joey Bagodonuts goes gonad exploring... and let me tell you, there aint many.
Apparently the whole 'beating my clit purple to the Lion King soundtrack' thing got played out. Now when she wants to gets more coin out of guys named Durwood, she whips the clam out next to family members. #SMRT
Meet Haley Ryder. Against all jurisdiction, she somehow wiped all her amateur scenes off the Internet before going pro... except this. In other words: What you're about to see is rarer than a Bruce Jenner orgasm.
This chumpo prefers his women to be on the defensive, specifically ones that have the best set of knockers I've seen this side of Walmart's customer service. And I swear, its the only ICP-fan sex tape you'll fap to today.
A coworker at Little Caesars once told me she used the side of a Redbull can to pleasure herself. She said the feeling of her deep-dish pizza bowl being grinded made her cum instantaneously. Is that what's going on here?
The definitive collection (read: 20) of defective women that french fry'd when they should've pizza'd. Perhaps I'm the minority, but I'm seeing reasons to get caught robbing a 7-11 w/ my penis out across the board here.
A beautiful face can make up for anything: Political strangleholds, war refugee negotiations, type 1 genital warts. But this girl? She's a weapon of mass erectile dysfunction and I don't know whether to fuck or flee...
Before today there were two things I was certain of. 1: Corey Feldman is the greatest entertainer of all time. And 2: We've seen the last of Chloes sexual endeavors. He proved me wrong once, but there will be no repeat.
If you're the type of guy that gets enjoyment out of unsuspecting migrants being surprised by grade-A southern California tit jobs, Elay is the girl for you. Not your style? Feel free to take a gander at this instead.
This is now-famous, OSU alumni Kendra Sunderland. Definitely late on this. Nevertheless, enjoy. For this is the only girl that's made me consider tapping my waifu body pillow fund to pay legal fees. Hardcore vid HERE.
Mia Khalifa: Pornstar of the millennium, and the only confirmed female to cause more havoc in the middle east than virgin cattle. She gets more death threats in a week than my mailbox gets bulldyke hatemail. #HOT