That's the same egotistical bitch who disrespected the legacy of Jumanji. You're probably already asking how do u top ambushing Mrs. Doubtfire's rectal cavity? Answer: You don't. But gnome sodomy is a close 2nd.
When you weigh as much as the penis you're being penetrated by, having sex is essentially assisted suicide. regret4life. Not even Carl Sagan's Voyage into the Cosmos can explain how this mismatch is possible.
This bitch is the Mother Teresa of blowjobs. I thought I was a pretty charitable bro after donating 3 Red Bulls to the caravan of female vagrants down my street last week. That's diddly squat compared to this Moesha.
If proportions at all play a role in the size of a man's cock, I'd guesstimate this little honcho is packing something in between a Jolly Rancher and a dinner mint. And yet he still lays pipe like a stud. RESPECT.
Okay so he's got be me beat by half an inch. But where I lack in size, I make up for in mobility. Bet you a hundred bucks that dwarf is incapable of doing my signature 'reverse pile driver' sex move. So beat that, motherfucker.
If I had a penis that big and a girlfriend that small, I'd be kinda concerned about potentially causing internal damage. With my luck, my cock would take a wrong turn and go through her chest like one of those little fuckers in the Alien movies.