Premature

  • Disappointment of the Day

    Disappointment of the Day

    I'm thinking it might be best you just stay behind that wall and never reveal your identity. That thing you're sticking through the wall has a hair trigger.

    Date: 09/25/17 Views: 164,627 Category: Premature

  • "that was it?"

    "that was it?"

    Scroll to 2:46 for her official statement. A sad moment indeed. Not really as depressing as Amy Schumer getting theatrical movie releases . I'd say more along the lines of depressing like when Adam West died. ya feel me dawg?

    Date: 07/09/17 Views: 170,715 Category: Premature

  • Too Tight, Can't Fight

    Too Tight, Can't Fight

    0:50: "keep going!"
    0:51: fffffghaarrrrgghh
    1:01: "did u really ju-?"

    Date: 05/13/17 Views: 262,723 Category: Premature

  • "IT WASN'T EVEN IN YET"

    "IT WASN'T EVEN IN YET"

    Her i drive a Dodge Caravan & use coupons on Vagisil look is on-point. She's also in need of an orgasm from something not-battery powered. The 'early' chestnut evacuation at :44 is fake. Her IRL desperation is not.

    Date: 07/05/16 Views: 157,644 Category: Premature

  • The 57 Second Man

    The 57 Second Man

    Technically 64 seconds but whos counting? The novelty of having a girlfriend with the waist-to-hip ratio of an underfed Kardashian must fade pretty quick when you can't last longer than a bag of Uncle Ben's instant rice.

    Date: 02/26/16 Views: 253,560 Category: Premature

  • 9 Inches, 20 Seconds

    9 Inches, 20 Seconds

    The excitement of having to tuck your cock into a sock must fade quick when your average run time is less than a Pizza Hut commercial. Unless that thing can lip sync, I'd say his time in front of a camera is done son.

    Date: 08/09/15 Views: 184,613 Category: Premature

  • SURPRISE MOTHER FUCKER!

    SURPRISE MOTHER FUCKER!

    Eight seconds of stroking and dude pops his cork faster than Kanye West looking at himself in a mirror. Skip on ahead to 0:51 seconds for British shaming at it's finest.

    Date: 04/06/15 Views: 182,563 Category: Premature

  • DON'T FUCKING STOP WHEN I CUM!

    DON'T FUCKING STOP WHEN I CUM!

    Don't let his above-average penis size and Jonathan Taylor Thomas moptop fool you. Even cool kids make mistakes in the eternal quest for female jism. She lets him off easy with a warning. and an STD.

    Date: 07/03/14 Views: 268,945 Category: Premature

  • DONT STOP! IM CUMMING! (he stops lol)

    DONT STOP! IM CUMMING! (he stops lol)

    She's 6 months preggo and has an ass-2-waist ratio that'd make Kim Kardashian soil her Gucci g-string in jealousy. She's also in need of an orgasm. Badly. Skip to the .40 mark for sexual failure at it's finest.

    Date: 06/10/14 Views: 418,732 Category: Premature

  • Greasy Cameltoe = Instant Ejaculation

    Greasy Cameltoe = Instant Ejaculation

    Mega milf makes her man blow his nut-butter faster than Richard Gere in an unsupervised petting zoo, all by simply straddling his Jimmy Dean breakfast sausage with her fat lips. Strangely hot. More here.

    Date: 05/21/14 Views: 313,002 Category: Premature

  • Adventurous Sex FAIL

    Adventurous Sex FAIL

    Rule #23 of spicing up your sex life: if you're gonna trek 7 miles out into the middle of nowhere for some outdoor sex - be sure to pack your numbing cream so you dont bust your nut in 8 seconds flat like this dumb asshole.

    Date: 04/21/11 Views: 146,918 Category: Premature