Well... on closer examination it seems the tomfoolery of lighting was hiding that whiskey barrel of a stomach being used as a pushup bra. No more Internet today.
It may not be written in the rule book, but there's only one translation for the body language on the girl going Milli Vanilli on herself. And it lives somewhere in between "i need to pay taxes" & "the cowboys choked". Three of life's guarantees.
Some people invest into their 401-K plans to insure a healthy retirement. Others, work until the grave. And then there's this marble garglin sonuvabitch who is going to burn every cent in the name of B tier semi-pornstar vaginal exploration.
Perhaps this could introduce a new filter option on popular dating and/or thirst trap applications such as Tinder and OnlyChromies.com? My boys would thrive.
One of those moments I can overlook the obvious health code violations because the performance is legendary. Be sure to leave them a ★★★★★ Yelp review. Something along the lines of: "Service was fast. Getting pubic lice was faster.".
What in the Tennessee whore house is going on here? Amphetamines? Autism? An unhealthy addiction to Abercrombie Labor Day sales? idk. but a sequel seems less likely than Lizzo being type casted outside of a Max Hardcore tribute movie.
Expected a green screen. Instead, I was roundhoused by whatever serbian family fuck fantasy is growing on the poop web. Hey Slavica, when ur done waxing dads pljeskavica, try investing in a webcam from this century. The goons will love you.
Girl is Lena Nitro. Guy is never getting another polish job like this ever again. The universe requires balance & the cholesterol level on this walrus is gonna prove it.
"Hungry Butt: When your rear end is starved of fresh air and eats your underwear and/or pants in an act of desperation. Also, when your ass is bigger than the pants surrounding it, therefore they stretch extra tightly into the pigeye area."
Dude's dick looks like an authentic Leberwurst recipe that got abandoned before the oven timer went off so one has to question the agenda here. More food tips.
Not everyone has this affinity for high prioritizing siphoning the python over a meaningful long lasting relationship. That's cuz not everyone is Anna Chambers
These full force fantasies videos are starting to get a little disturbing. And like one of the greatest voices of our generation once taught us: you never go full force.
uhh I'm no expert, but I think it might be time to pack it up and find a safer hobby. Like... collecting Pokemon cards, or maybe building hydrogen bombs for example.
Short of being an extra on Rocco's Retirement Village Tour (coming 2035) - I'm not sure how this talent comes in handy. Never knowing the feels of a consensual relationship maybe? An existence without having to shop for birthday gifts?
Social media misfit suffering from the combo of attention whoring & bug-eyed bitch syndrome performs the unhealthiest act of eroticism I've witnessed since girl_shits_herself_at_limp_bizkit_concert.mp4. Didn't see that one? ur missing out.
2:00 AM, face down and dressed like she just got done cleaning a traveling circus bathroom with her bare hands. If that isn't enough to bring your chicken nugget to maximum crispiness, then you clearly haven't spent a weekend in Romania.
Big wtf @ #3. She taps out, instigates a fist fight and then concludes that all in all it was "fun and amazing". No lady. Going diarrhea in a community pool overun by minorities is fun and amazing. What happened to u was unceremoniously brutal.
LIFE LESSON #193: When entering a partnership, make sure there are contractual agreements to both disbursement of payments and amount of work from both parties. Otherwise you'll be splitting rent money with Becky & her dry mud flaps.